SADNESS LIVES HERE

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Sadness has stalked me
Sadness has made me
Sadness has curled me
Sadness has injured me
Sadness has broken me
Yet it still lives here, sadness

Stalked me into sadness
Made me into sadness
Curled me into sadness
Injured me into sadness
Broken me into sadness
Sadness, yet it still lives here

I have nowhere to run or hide
Nowhere to rest my tired heart
How long has it been
That I allowed sadness in
Encroaching in my sanity
I have felt that heaviness
Understood
That sadness
Lives here

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I OWN ALL OF MY TEARS

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Drunken in deep depression

My will just about giving out

A perfect facade

Of a loss I cannot get over

Take me home father

Let this world not know me anymore

I cannot seem to stop

All these tear drops

From drenching my chest

With memories

Of what could have been

I want to own all of my tears

Maybe then my hurt will stop

As I will never get to sing you a lullaby

 

 

NOBODY SAID

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Nobody said it would hurt
When your love was not returned
Nobody said it would break you
When he did not love you back
Nobody said it would feel raw
When he never said he loved you
Nobody said it would pain
When he remained silent
Nobody said it would cause chaos
When he did not share your feelings
Nobody said it would drown you
When you loved alone
Nobody said it would end in tears
When he did not hold your heart
Nobody said it would destroy you
When he did not embrace you
Nobody said it would make you hate
When he did not hold your heart
Nobody said it would make you cry
When he did not touch your soul
Nobody said
Nobody ever says
You are left to cry alone
You are left to weep silently
You are left to bare loss
You are left to feel hurt
You are left to writhe pain
You are left holding your heart
You are left tying your shoestring
You are left hugging yourself
When he leaves
Even though
He was never yours

I SHOULD NOT CRY

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I should not cry
My turn to love is not yet
My turn to live is not nigh
To live with love
Is what I seek
Go away you loneliness
Take your leave you sadness
Have a way out
You longing for arms that warm
I should not cry
My turn to hold is not yet
My turn to spend is not near
To live with warmth
Is what I search
Go away you lonesomeness
Have a way out
You yearning for fingers that curl
I should not cry
My turn to wish is not yet
My turn to cherish is not nigh
To live with cozynness
Is what I seek
Go away you lost feeling
Have a way out
You searching for hands that hold
I should not cry

I WILL CRY LATER

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When the lights are out
When everyone is asleep
When owls have stopped hooting
When crickets no longer sing
I will cry later
When the moon is no longer full
When stars disappear
When midnight
Midnight has 25 hours
I will cry later
When nobody is watching
When the crowds no longer sing
When feet move no more
When music has stopped
When it is all still
When nightmares abound
When I can no longer hold on
I will cry later
When my heart has found a tear
When my soul finds a voice
When my whisper stops being heard
When everyone snores
They can no longer hear my voice
Or listen to my whimpers
Against the pillow
How I yearn to cry
Bleed tears of sadness
Until my blood is no longer red
But black as darkness
Black as oil
Black as midnight
Black as soil
I will cry later
When my later is now
When everything stops
And I am left with myself
Just me and my damned tears
Damned to drown all else
I will cry later
When later is now
And my tears
Don’t Sting anymore

I HATE GOODBYE

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I had yet to say hello
Still I had to say goodbye
I hate goodbyes
Final words
That should not be said
When you left
After you left
I cannot say goodbye yet
Because I hate it

IF I DIE YOUNG

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Do not cry for me when I’m gone
Because I felt no pain of existing
I was never touched by human hurt
I never experienced harsh emotions
Like the hatred sometimes of humanity
I did not experience intense anger
I was never rejected or abandoned
If I die young
Shed no tears for me
Because I am at peace
I will not experience reality of hardship
Nor cry because my heart ailed
I will not feel the intensity of hunger pains
Or the dread of unmet wants
I will not be
In physical, emotional, spiritual pain
If I die young
Before I have breathed on this earth
Know that I still loved you
If you never held me in your arms
Know that I still felt your embrace
If you never kissed my cheeks
Know your warmth I already had
Weep not at my grave
Because I still live in your heart
Wipe those tears I see in your eyes
Unburden that ache I feel in your heart
Take away that grief
I am grieving with you too
If I die young
I know I am still loved by you
Inside the Maze of pain you carry
Know I am still with you